Thoughts on the Blogosphere

I'm torn. I've been thinking a lot lately about the online world, about social media and personal branding and what that means to a career. I've been very active in the social media world, but purely on a personal level. I've been loathe to start doing it on a professional basis. Why? Let me list it all out.

• I'm in Marketing, but I'm not all that passionate about marketing. It's a job, and my current chosen career path, but I don't love it enough to immerse myself in it. I think that immersion and passion are key if you're going to have anything worth sharing online.
• I don't feel that I have much expertise. I don't care enough to become an expert in any area of marketing. I've always been more of a generalist, which has served me well so far, but doesn't lend itself to a targeted social media identity.
• I suppose I could write about my one potentially career-related passion, which is writing. But again, I haven't developed any real expertise. I just know it's what I want to do someday.
• I think there's a lot of pressure to proactively prepare for a jobsearch. I read the other day that if you can't be personally googled, you might as well not exist. I see many blogs and LinkedIn network pages, and I suspect that many people are doing it to build themselves up for a kickass job somewhere down the road. This is what they're recommending these days, and it strikes fear in my heart -- what if I lose my job and can't get another one because I didn't do the same? Do I really need to have thousands of LinkedIn connections and a viral blog in order to get a job?
• Which leads me to my next question: who has time to do that if you already have a full-time job?
• I would rather blog about whatever I want and not feel limited to blogging about career-appropriate subjects. I don't want to have to censor myself, or maintain two blogs/LinkedIn profiles/Twitter profiles. I want to be myself. I don't feel I can really be me if I want to "build a personal brand." I doubt any potential employer would hire me if they see half the crap I say on Twitter and Facebook. Which begs the question -- if that's the case, would I want to work for such a company?
• And really, how much more can I stand of corporate life? If I were to lose my current gig, would I really want to go back? Would it be worth all the effort in the end?
• I've always wanted to be different. To stand out somehow. I feel like anything I could possibly blog about is already being blogged about by a thousand other people. Who would care about what I have to contribute? This is also an insecurity I have about my writing, which makes it difficult for me to discipline myself and actually write. My own issue to manage.
  

Maybe I have commitment issues when it comes to my career. Maybe I have regrets over the decisions I've made and the paths I've forged in my career. And maybe I don't know what to do about that, so I just toddle along as I am. Just the thought of a career change scares the bejesus out of me and draws many protests from my husband.

So I just keep going, and wonder why I never find the true balance I'm always seeking.